Growing Up....Tall Teenage Girls
Help and Advice for the rapidly growing
Many (but not all) of our female members had a tough time growing up, especially as tall teenagers. We just want you to know, that you are not alone and that many of us have gone through some pretty bad times in those years. It is hard to appreciate the advantages of being taller than nearly every one else at a time in your life when you most likely do not want to not stand out from the crowd.
We hope some of the quotes below from our members will help you realise that other people have been through what you are experiencing now, and have come out of it stronger and happier and are able to embrace all the advantages that being very tall has in life.
Below is an example of a question asked recently by a concerned 5`6 mother of a tall 6`1 teenage girl who she could not relate to her (on the height issue) and who was very unhappy at school and at home. Here some of the answers from our members on closed group Facebook page:
" My sister is 5'7, mum is 5'9.. I'm 6'7 and my 3 year old daughter is 3'6..
All i can say is you're going to hear mean things and nice things said to you and about you to do with your height.. But at the end of the day you're still you and your beautiful tall self.. and their just jealous of your height and their short selves..
Please don't ever let anyone get you down about your height, because in the long run your height will get you places in life, so use that height to your advantage..
As for clothes their are plenty of tall clothing lines for women these days so don't give up hope on that side of things 😊"
"Hi I am sorry to hear that she is having a hard time. I was bullied at school ignored for most of it, had applied thrown at my head and all-sorts. What saved me was I was introduced to a local riding school where I was accepted for my height. I am still friends with my best friend clare, 16 years later. One of the school bullies tried to add me on Facebook years later I ignored it of course. It does get easier. Listen support and keep doing what your doing. You never get over it but it makes you a stronger person. Xx"
"I got called lurch at school and spent years wishing I was petite so I could fit in. Now I couldn’t be any happier to be the height I am and at tall club I try to stand upright to look taller! School is tough but so many studies have shown the advantages of being tall. I’m happy to pass on my contact details to them"
"Teach her to love herself. Tell her that many people will be judgemental but to not get mad at them, tell her they are still learning to be a kind person. I grew super fast and asst 13 I was 6'5". I learned from a young age to love yourself for who you are. Why change! There is only 1% of the world that is over 6'4...we are special!"
"I got called daddy long legs a lot in high school. I'm 6' and I was a teenager in 1977 when there weren't many tall women around. Kids are going to tease over everything and anything, whether you are short or tall, brunette or blonde, etc. You must be comfortable in your own body and accepting. Which took me a lifetime. But I'm married to my husband who is 6'3", my father and brother in law are both 6'6" and my son is 6'7". Tell her it will get better, especially in college where women basketball and volleyball players are all very tall nowadays. Stay positive. Tall is beautiful."
"I stopped growing at 16 years old when I reached 6’6” but fortunately had a tall family who constantly chided me to stand and sit up straight and to walk tall. Positive reinforcement from home and supportive friends was a help but nothing can take the pain of rejection and being the butt of jokes from strangers away. Looking straight ahead and pretending not to hear was an art form mastered early. Looking down the nose with utter disdain was another. They were a shield on the outside until I grew up on the inside.
I know basketball was/is something many tallies avoid. I would have done so too having been the PE/Games lesson reject throughout school. The lure of international travel and representing my country was what drew me. In the space of 10 months, it gave me the world on a plate and a university education I’d never have earned without it. Reject basketball and other tall-loving sports (tennis, swimming, rowing) if you have to, but try to find an interest/hobby to pursue in which you can find solace.
Finally to parents: do not pass on your anxiety in your child’s stature - or your frustration at not finding the right clothes/shoes/equipment - to that child. They are struggling enough as it is! Take a deep breath and eventually, like so many of us, they will spend more of their lives content with who they are in their frame than they ever did in the discomfort of their adolescence."
"Be positive about her height. Even as an average height teenager, the going is tough but it is more so when you are taller than your peers. Encourage her to be proud of her height and remind her that she is beautiful. Encourage her to see the positives in being so tall, whether that is in sports, fashion or being physically outstanding. Bottom line though is self acceptance. This is not something she can change so why be miserable about it?
My mother always encouraged me to be proud of my height. There were many downs as a teenager but she kept reiterating that I needed to be proud of my height. She was encouraging and supportive. I would encourage this mum to do the same."
"I think she just needs to remember that the girl is 14 and probably the majority of her peers are also miserable too (for all sorts of reasons) I have a 6ft 16 year old who loves being the tallest at school but thought she was fat at 14 (she isn’t) but this is what being a teenager is all about. They go through some really tough periods of time but those will pass. Mum can only love her, support her and tell her she’s awesome. Maybe also point out some"
"Oh bless her i remember it well. I was 6 ft at that age and now 6 ft 2. My advice would be stay strong, be proud of who you are and what you look like.
As hard as it is now it does get easier.
I turned my height into a positive by playing sports that need tall people. I joined the netball and basketball team and became really good!
Trained lots and then became respected for my sport and height that way.
Kids are cruel as can adults be. I also did some catwalk modelling and this also boosted my confidence.
I was raised to be a pretty strong girl and I know its hard huni. Have your tears at home and stand up tall and proud.
Do not allow the bullies to get you down.
Sending love and tall hugs 😘 you've got this girl xx"
"I was 6 ft at 11 and now 6 ft 2 with 5 sons who are taller than me and taller than my husband who is 5 ft 10. Love yourself and be a warm lovely person. Everyone who meets you will remember you as you are unique. You will stand out in a crowd so use this to your advantage. Just be friendly lovely person and enjoy life. Life is too short for wishing you could change something you can’t. I used to cry and wish I could be a normal height but now I love myself I love that I stand out . I found that most hurtful comments come from people who are jealous of your height. Especially at school as you look so grown up and they still look like a child. Be amazing. Give them something to stare at. My mum is 5 ft 5 my sister is 5 ft 10 so I always felt like the odd one out but now I embrace my height and try to enjoy the attention which I know isn’t easy when you are young but with confidence you will . Use your height to your advantage and take up a sport. I hated sport at school but now I find I love using my height to my advantage and more fun than going to the gym to keep fit as you also make new friends. Good luck."
"I was 5'11" by age 14 (finished up at 6'1") everyone in my family is average height including my siblings, only my dad was tall. I always felt like the odd one out but as I've got older I've learned to accept myself, I was born to standout and I embrace that now. I wish I'd had someone to instill that confidence in me when I was a teen. I would also say that generations are getting taller and it's not so unusual anymore, im 35 but there is much more choice when it comes to fashion these days."
"I was tall from birth..! Parents are 5’10 & 6’2, both grandfathers were 6’2 & 6’4, and one grandmother was 5’10... so no chance of myself or my siblings being short arses. 😂. At aged 6, I was a full head taller than my friends, at 10, I was 5’5. I stopped growing at 15 years of age at 6’2.. Being so tall has not been an easy journey, as by nature I’m rather a quiet shy person, which made it a bit challenging sometimes to cope with the comments. I have never wished I was shorter, no point in that, but now that I’m a lot older (60), I have noticed I very rarely get negative comments. I suspect people can detect a more confident person, plus, I’ve married a 6’7 man, who gets noticed first anyway!! 😂
I am still a self conscious person by nature, but I really love being tall. 👍👍"
"I was 5ft 8 with size 9 feet when I started secondary school age 11. I was so proud about it that I wrote a story about it being my usp! Over the next few years I would bend my knees in assembly, bury my feet in the sand at the beech.. embarrassed by being big. Looking back I think it was general teenage awkwardness. As soon as I hit 16/17 I loved my height (by this time 5ft 11) and when I discovered I there were actually places that I could get half decent fashionable women’s shoes, there was no stopping me! 😃"
"At age 10 I was 5’10” and wore size 10 shoes, I stood head and shoulders above the rest of the class including the teachers in the 80’s this was pretty tough and I was bullied for it but i didn’t let it get me down and I went on to do the most amazing things related to my height and through TPC (Tall Persons Club) have met the most amazing people."
Perhaps you are a parent and simply want to talk with the parents of other tall children, and to share experiences. For example, how do you get the teachers to understand that just because a child appears to be several years older than they are it doesn't mean that they can perform to the expected level of older children of the same height. Unreasonably high expectations, which a child cannot live up to, may leave them with a sense of inadequacy or failure and shatter their self-confidence. Teachers especially need to be made aware of this.
Tall children are also disproportionately likely to be bullied at school, something that most adults do not appreciate. The tall child has to be the aggressor, right? Wrong. You need to make sure that the adults that your child comes into daily contact with understand this. You may feel that your doctor has been less than sympathetic about your concerns over your child’s height. We can provide basic information about the medical syndromes which may lead to unexpected height, some of which are explained in our Medical Information section.
We are learning more about what tall children need and want and what their parents’ concerns are. You can help, by letting us know what you want to see in this section.
Just send us an email and tell us what you need from this service or write to the club at the usual address.
Here are some useful links with advice on being tall from our favourite tall blogger Angie K:
Advice for Tall Children's parents about body confidence
How to deal with comments about your height nicely
I am tall does this make me different
A Tall Womans Book (from the tall blogger Angelina Pelova)
Pregnant fashion tips